Anthony’s Life:

I asked Jesus to take the wheel 
watched him shrug, explain in
slurred excuses that he was too drunk
didn’t have a learner’s permit
my life was just a little too toxic
to dirty his fingers

but I knew this already

my confetti hands ruptured
digging through fistfuls of backhanded compliments
broken glass, teeth trying to gnaw out my spirit
I have screamed into the night 

It doesn’t fucking matter
whether the glass is half empty or full
we can still drown in it

sometimes I beg for it
and when I don’t
it’s only because 
my voice already fake climaxed on 
apologies and ramen 
spewed from the mouths of people
who couldn’t even admit we had been friends
in the biblical sense
I am whatever summation can be gathered
from the very last period-

either you’re happy it’s over
or you never made it that far.

© Kathrynn Axton